What a Day

Hmm Had to work today, I know everyone else off today and I had to work thank god for radio, Radio 1 to be precise they did a 10hr pick your own songs type show and it was a cracking good show apart from one glitch...
Why oh WHY would anyone in their right mind want "Spice Girls - Wannabe" played - full listing is available at the website just look for "10 hour takeover" or similar
I got to clean the house over the next few days ARGH I hate cleaning..

Films

Argh!! Darn it Can't watch any of them... DVD drive appears to be broken either that or the software has gone and died... Argh wasn't able to watch anything... and I won't until I can figure it out and get it fixed

Easter Weekend

Oh the joys of easter, hmm well maybe...
Lets see this year I've not got any easter eggs and not bought any not even from my nephew, mind you he'll get enough from other people..
I also got work the long weekend :| oh well at least it should be quiet at work - well maybe....
Hmm learned a new command today: End What If :)
I've stuck a whole load of them in the program that is my life...
Ah! much better...
Hmm the only things I now got worry about is watch Film to watch next

No More Alcohol.....

Though it was about time I stuck another entry into this online diary of my life (what there is of it).
Well I decided a few weeks ago that I wouldn't get anymore alchol like i normally do when Im not working the next day, so far so go, been almost a month.
Alcohol wasn't "doing anything" for me, wasn't helping me forget, was more like showing me the "darkness" Not a Good Idea at all.
I watched Donnie Darko the other week on DVD and I got it 1st time, got me thinking it did..... Life is what it is and nothing can change that even if you could change time other things you might not want to happen will happen... A Paradoxical Thought eh..

"The Darkness....."
Hmm why I still go back to all the point of my first true relationship, looking for things I could have done differently, things I should have done, things I shouldn't have (possibly), should have said, should never have said (words can hurt greater than any blade can). Think IF ONLY, but now it's too late for that.
Those who say "you'll get over it" or "go out and find someone new" have never felt the true pain of breaking up with someone you deeply love.
Im one of those people, I wear my heart on my sleeve, what can I say...
I show my emotions the full range, I cry, weep, sob, smile, laugh, giggle, glow with inner happiness, blush, grimice and all the other emotions you can feel... although the negitive ones don't get to rear there head that often, I try not to bear grudges etc..
There I've Said it.. Heartache takes Time but at least I can say "I feel"

Ponderance

Hmm well lets see it's Sunday, I didn't get up until Afternoon, Dang this cold... Mind you I suppose I am fighting it...
Hmm my mate was around the other day, dropped of a game called Tetris 4000, hmm intrestingly ADDICTIVE game, 2 games, many levels and difficulty settings also, you can put your own music in the background .......

Modems

How is this for stupid, my modem dies and I'll be able to get broadband at the end of the month.. Hmm oh well get a new modem in a few days when Im not working

Life Errors

Hmm I don't know if Im up, down, to the left or to the right....
I'm all over the place, some days I just feel like crying for no reason... wierd.... ARGH!

Ponderings and musings

Hmm well that time of year approaches, just another day to me.
I get to watch all the romantics in the world do all the romantic stuff like flowers, cards and stuff.. hmm fun...
What will I be doing... working, but it won't be without some fun....
Boy setting up the office staff they way I have is so much fun...
now I really must figure out how to / who to get to do some flash for me :>
I know you'll all tell me it's simple but heck I can't get my head around it yet..

Having Fun and on the rebound still (so keep away :P)

Hmm What a Day

Hmm it's been one of those days at work, you know the sort where you wanna just come home half way through but stay on just to say you did it...
hmm well colleague went to set up a CCTV camera on a remote site and all went well till he turned it on... and the gremlin of a Duff Connection reared its head.. BT said the line was okay (it wasn't) well got the camera up eventually and got it all running and as then it died totally, I left with it down... oh well thank god I got a nice 4 days off to relax in....

Happy and Tired

What a Week

Hmm well what a week...
Windscreen got scratched and needed replacing.. the bit that caused the scratch I can't get till tuesday at the earliest (dang cars)
Hmm work is work.. loving winding my boss up with the "affair" me and the company sectary are supposed to be having... lol what a laugh
Hmm decided that having the slowest machine as the main machine wasn't on.. besides I want 5.1 Sound :D shame it takes so dang long to re-install Everything.. Power cuts excluded...

Well I'm off to sleep / have some fun or both ;)

Hmm Interesting

I ask the Question, What made you think we were drifting apart / why didn't you say anything yesterday and so far nothing... odd oh well....
What is one to do eh?

Woke Up and Found The Sun / It's Good to Talk

Hmm woke up this Morning and saw the sun... Yeah The Sun you know that Yellow Star about 93 million miles away that provides heat and stuff, that... (Previous entry was erm "late / early") and after that entry someone got on to me... hmm Thank you Sav... Made me see sense when I wasn't sobar (hmm interesting)..
But I woke up this morning and felt better, hmm It's part of the healing process.
I care about the answer to the question but it's not important now...
Oh I took someone elses advice as well give my PC a "minor" upgrade, well my K6-3-400 got retired I replaced it with a XP2600+ :D just to crunch :P

Body Language & the Finality of it all

Hmm took me a while but erm dang I just realised Im totally crap at reading it... oh well just goes to show how much I suck at somethings...

Hmm only 2 more days at work then I'm off for a whole 3 days woo hoo....
Hmm Finality.. well maybe, maybe not...
Yes if you don't could a 21st B/day party in the middle of next year... lol

D-Day

Hmm well it went okay, I suppose... hmm
Was there for 90 minutes which is longer than had intended but it was good, kinda finalised things...
give her an "air kiss" goodbye, don't know why habit I suppose...
Some habits die hard...

Feels strange now...
Oh well there is always June to consider, her 21st... don't know if I wanna go right now, I think I will

Don't Ya Hate having to Tidy Up..

Well I decided tidy up today and found a whole load of paperwork that could be thrown out... Hmm tested my nice new xmas pressie out too, the Paper Shreader...
Works a treat too, only 24hrs to go until D-Day... I'll be fine...
Maybe

Xmas Working and 2 Days to D-Day

Hmm Gotta love working xmas day... nothing to do but move the cameras on the sites around... yawn for 12hrs but hey it passes the time...
Hmm got some nice presents: a couple of DVD's, hmm chocs, bottle of whiskey (erm not a single malt - must be from work :P), more chocs, hmm new electric toothbrush (hmm someone hinting at something) and erm a minishreader - DEFINATLY hinting at something... hmmm sitting here chillin' out with my mate listening to Morcheeba - Parts of the Process and drinking Tia Lusso over ice...

Happy Xnas Everyone :) and Thank you for keeping my sprits up :)
Oh Now on to the bad stuff... 2 days till I go and give someone her present.
Hmm this should be fun to handle. :-S

Hmm Day 5 at work..

Hmm nice quiet day at work, hmm yeah right...
Well it was...
Hmm oh well I can now look forward to lets see oh yeah a whole 2 days off
Im working Xmas day.. :-S
My Computer is acting up more than John Cleese doing a cheese commerial... lol

It's Been a While Since That Dark Day...

Hmm still feel lost, empty..
Strange it's been a while, almost a month.
Where does time go
Can I win her back who knows?
Can we ever get back together after whats gone before?
We'll see I still have a xmas present for her gonna give it to her after xmas..
That will be hard to do I think.
Hmm only 4 more days at work to go...
Dang Holiday cover
Oh well

Interesting Day

Hmm Got up,
gave my car an oil change, really simple to do but a little messy if you don't watch what yer doing... hmm
Went to See LOTR: TRK - 3hrs long but *jaw drops* *2 thumbs Up* rocking good film, can switch bits of me off that hurt and just be absorbed into the film..
There are one or 2 bits that had me crying I will admit that but not saying where cos I'm not gonna spoil the film
Oh Well Work tommorrow

Poetry

Hmm Wrote a poem today while at work...
It kinda sums up what and how and maybe why I feel the way I feel.
Answers some questions asks more... hmm intresting mind you my poetry always is.