Another Year

Oh well another year is over and one is about to begin.. hmm what to attempt to be this year aka NYR's
Hmm - nope no point I never think of any really good ones or ones that are so obviously going to be done..

Three Things.....

Okay This is due to my "good" friend moogie putting my name in the last section on her quiz...

Three names you go by:
1. Gordon
2. Gopher
3. G man
There are others but let's not go there shall we..

Three screennames you have:
1. Gopher_The_Angelic_Uncle
2. Gopher_Yarrowzoo
3. Gopher
I know I got more but they are on the same vain lol

Three things you like about yourself:
1. I'm sorry I'm not vain at all
2. Nothing
3. and erm nothing

Three things you hate/dislike about yourself:
1. I told you I'm not vain.
2. Nothing
3. oh nothing.....

Three parts of your heritage:
1. Scottish
2. Scottish
3. oh and did i mention scottish

Three things that scare you:
1. Heights
2. Drowning ( a little bit)
3. ?
and no it's not death, death doesn't scare me at all.

Three of your everyday essentials:
1. Tea (real tea not the iced crap)
2. My Mobile phone
3. Multitudes of Music

Three things you are wearing right now:
1. Jeans
2. Tshirt a "T in the Park The 10th Year" very good weekend
3. Socks

Three of your favorite bands/artists at the moment:
1. Snow Patrol - Irish band based in Glasgow nice sound - Album : Final Straw
2. Embrace - Good band, this is a comeback Album and it's Good - Album: Out of Nothing
3. Scissor Sisters - Nice New York Band - good sound I don't know i just like it - Album : Scissor Sisters (try saying that on the radio)
Actually I could easily add 4,5,6,7 and probably 8 there is a lot of good stuff out and I got a shed load of albums to

Three of your favorite songs at present:
1. "Chocolate" Snow Patrol
2. "Glorious Day" Embrace
3. "The Blower's Daughter" Damien Rice + many many more

Three things you want to try in the next 12 months:
1. Write more in my Online Diary
2. Get a life
3. God only knows

Three things you want in a relationship (love is a given):
1. Respect.
2. Companionship.
3. Intellect.

Two truths and a lie:
1. I'm cute
2. I'm modest
3. I can go eye to eye with Micheal Jorden without using a stepladder or the like....

Three physical things about the opposite sex (or same) that appeals to you:
1. Brains
2. Eyes
3. Body

Three things you just can’t do:
1. Sit up dead straight - goggle Scoliosis and you see why
2. Liftin' and thing heavy see above
3. I don't know honest

Three of your favorite hobbies:
1. music - I can play a little
2. cross-stitch - don't ask I do good at it.
3. graphics

Three things you want to do really badly right now:
1. sleep it's late

Three careers you’re considering:
1. none spring to mind

Three places you want to go on vacation:
1. Vacation what are those, can I buy them pre packed?

Three kids names:
1. I don't got none

Three things you want to do before you die:
1. I have no asparations like that.

Three people who have to take this quiz now or die a slow painful death:
1. Noone - Im not that cruel

Holidays

Hmm must remember not to drink so much makes me wanna say stuff to people - hmm and nope don't get hangovers - unless I drink bacardi or maybe it's cos i mixed it with something else hmm that will be it..
darn it, I think I'll just write "it" all down on a piece of paper.. Oh affairs of the heart never run easy or smooth..

Christmas Day

Well what a fun day this has been, got up erm "late" - it was just morning, just ;)
Opened all the presents I had- hmm 5.1 surrond DVD + TV (got that earlier), Bottle of Bailey's - hmm that will go down nice, Sweets - hmm well everyone gets the munchies now and then.. some PJ's won't go there, Shower gel and the like - hmm people trying to tell me something oh yeah they didn't quite know what to get me lol. Hmm Went to see nephew - that was fun hmm i'm sure he was cheating when I was racing him around his new scaltrix track hmm, got a bottle of macmillan single malt whisky hmm more alchol for me ;) and a robot shaped radio alarm clock from my newphew who has gone a bit robot mad this year..
He got one of those really cool robosapiens from santa but it don't wanna play ball (might just have to call santa and tell him off) oh well time to crack open the bailey's - oh did I mention my mate is here and he has even more baileys oh hope I don't run out of ice...*hic*

Useful day maybe

Hmm managed to finally solve a problem we were having at work.
I finally got to go and see the other end of the connection that was the problem, hooked into the router at that end - told it to behave, gave it some more info to make it play nice and it did, well port mapping external to internal ip will do that lol (maybe I shouldn't have stuck it in the DMZ) but it worked when we tried it and keep stable for hours lol I go to try it just before leaving as we have to check the remote camera only every so often - and "Nothing" NO... can't be
oh well it was a useful day upto that point
God darn it it will be something equally STUPID (like me!)

Feelings, all my life is feelings....

hmm do I, don't I, Argh I don't know what to do...
Do I write a letter to someone explaining how i feel about them and be made a fool of maybe due to the minor fact that sometimes they let slip things i've told, okay maybe not what i wrote maybe I hope.

or do i not, do I hide my feelings once more, like i'm doing now - I don't know what a moral dilemma...
Do I tell her that i'm the shoulder she can cry on, the shelter in the storm, the tower of strength she can draw on.. or do i not..

Xmas Day

Going to be an interesting xmas day as my sister and my parent ain't talking to each other.. oh well I guess I'll still see my nephew at night lol after I've had dinner I'll probably pop along and open some more presents and get thanked for ones i sent (hmm must remember and actually take my sisters gift with me)
Hmm don't say it - xmas is a family thing ~ not in this family it ain't ~ unless you wanna count a couple of stubborn people as stubborn as mules that is ...

Lazy Day

Decided after all the exitement yesterday and with the extra time I've done at work to have a day where I didn't go anywhere - just relaxed at home, played some music, what some tv & generally chill out...
Remind me not to include alchol in that equation next time - ended up about 1am depressed due to alcohol (darn it sucks)

Crash, Bang, Ouch!

Hmm next time I get the urge to take down a large whiteboard, kill me it will save me doing it later. NO i didn't kill or injury myself or anyone else when taking it down, well i did but only a smallish bruise I hope... it Hurts like hell because it's on the upper arm..
Had the idea of taking it down
Me - boss this board is off no use here can I take it down?
Boss - sure, no point in it being up there if it's not being used...
(or words to that effect)
Me - Ok..
Took all the screws out bar one, yup it was the last one that sunk me, oh that and a minor problem with a barrier being "UP" that I went to take down... Brain in "neutral" for sure...
you can imagine what happened next...
the screw holding it to the wall was only just slackened... it moved sideways and down on this...
nothing to worry you thing nothing in the way I've been sensible and cleared it all away - wrong "Blonde" moment.. didn't move Computer monitor out the way 1st and you guessed it , it went for a flying lesson straight to the floor. Now it don't work and makes noises that it shouldn't oh well have to figure out how to replace it temporaryly.. darn my shoulder hurts cos I got the board on the shoulder as I had to lever it out ..
Darn it call me BLONDE for sure..
had to laugh like either that or cry - oh well it wasn't one of the companies monitors anyway it was someone elses and they ain't got no spares oh well..

Panic !

Hmm got home like normal - later than normal did some overtime, went down to shop to get stuff and also to get a pizza from place next to shop and.....
It was closed - not normally closed on a wednesday kinda went "eh!!"
food what am i gonna eat - was looking forward to a ham & mushroom with peppers pizza but no I'll have to settle for a Microwavable Cheese burger and some chips well actually I passed on the chips couldn't be bothered..

Roadworks

Don't ya just hate them, on the way home from work taking another route because I fill up my car on a monday, nice simple and easy to remember if i do it every week. Done that expected a little bit more traffic than normal it being close to christmas and all but no - STANDSTILL! well rolling standstill and of course by time I realised there was a problem I was on the slip road and couldn't get off..
Took me 40 minutes to go something like 3 miles or something like that.
Didn't know there was roadworks on the road did I - thought I'll take the next slip road off but no that's the one they were working on :| God Darn It oh well after that of course road cleared was able to get up some speed - journey that normally takes 15 minutes took 50 was not best pleased shall we say.

Re: Website

Woo hoo got around to the last few pages tonight and it's all complient well
not really but the 1 page that isn't won't ever be unless do a minor re-write of it and that's gonna happen anyway as I'm tweaking that page and removing the code that is causing the fault to another page and doing the same thing in a different way. I'm toying with merging the entire sidebar + the "clock" - which is causing the problem because of the way I coded it - don't ask HTML complience is a royal pain in the rear but useful if people see it and say well I wonder if he can help me :D
so if you wanna go and visit this site and see (oh and feel free to leave comments private / public it don't matter)
http://www.yarrowzoo.freeserve.co.uk
updates coming soon - it's all there just some pages need refreshing they are a bit stale lol (go on say it why didn't I update them when I was getting them complient - because I don't know what to add / tweak yet lol)

Waste of Space

Hmm ever have a colleague at work who is a complete "waste of space" sometimes, useful to have around but sometimes ya just wish they would "**** off and die" or words to that effect....
Thankful he was out the office doing some "work", i put it in quotes cos that's what it was - meant to go to one place and fix something but it needed something arranged and he didn't check to see if this had been done.
thankfully however he managed to go some place else and fix something else on the list of things we got to fix 1 down so many to go...

To make matters worse we had a Work Inspection to allow us to continue to say was are approved by blah, we past thank god...
Roll on Friday

Re: A random entry

Remember how i said I'd be back to fix the network I was at last friday
Knew I'd be back as "the muppet" forgot to pick up the network switch from IT (and the RJ45 crimp tool + crimps just incase I'd mucked up one of the connectors), install it, move the wifi box from downstairs, test that it all worked correctly and tidy it up. I know for a fact he hates working with RJ45 connector. So i went down to discover that he was trying to get a Digibox (Digital TV down the co-ax kinda new in the UK) to stay tuned in and not have any picture loss / breakup / drop out and the dude who was helping him snapped the main TV ariel so a 10 minute job became 2hrs as my mate who was driving had to go get a new ariel so ya can image what I was like, got the whole thing tested as best as I could - plugged in the wifi unit and saw there was a connection to the socket it was going to, tested the other it failed - darn it if one of the pairs hadn't flipped around :-S oh well fixed that and it worked nicely - got the laptop with wifi built in to it and instant connect and a perfect connection.. Saved the day, then i had to get back to work asap as someone was covering why me and my colleague (we share the shift between us see previous entries for pattern) and thus I wanted to let them go home..
What a day - got the TV tuned perfectly (God Im a genius ta boot) :P

Website

Well I decided today that my site really could be better so I thought right what's the best way to see how good it is, check it for complience at the CSS / HTML checker on the w3c site.. this is gonna be fun I only got like 20 pages to check (and fix - probably)

Xmas Shopping

Had the idea that I'd get up early, wash my car (it's silver well it used to be silver) and then do most if not all my xmas shopping in town..
Didn't get up early, went into town and erm well let's see got most of it just got 1 person to get and then I remember "my colleagues" at work - eek oh well there is always next week or some personalised CD eh...

A random entry

This is a complete random entry just for the sheer unadulterty heck of it...
well not so random..
Got to love being able to get out the office and do some "field" work..
well heck all i had to do was pick up a couple of RJ45 couplers and put on 4 or 5 RJ45 connectors and wire up a couple of network points - cable had been run
dead simple - couldn't test it cos didn't have a 10/100 Switch as someone forgot to mention the small fact when I was going for the couplers otherwise I'd have gotten a nice 5 port one at the same time... oh well no doubt I'll be back to test it next week.. should be fun Cat 5 is such fun to work with (more fun then who I was working beside - *mutters something about a muppet*

Re: Money

Thank god I'm on the early shift, able to get to the bank again today..
Put check in, ah cash in the account.. my card ain't gonna bounce
:)

Money

Argh... I need my wages check this month - god darn it new car has kinda sucked the account a little drier than normal...
Got it today, went to bank - discover it's dated 30/11/04 no can cash it (and have it instantly clear) till tommorrow argh... I could put it in but it would take about a week to clear
thank god I can get to the bank tommorrow...
God damn wages clerk

More Musings

Hmm woke up this morning, did what I normally do.. hmm munching on a slice of toast - notice a letter has arrived now this is like oh 8:45am we are lucky to see postperson before like 9:30am and the post has been (hmm must be on bonus)
and guess what it was - my pin number for my new bank card - hmm not bad.. need more money since I managed to spend all the money I got out on Saturday...
Christmas is exspensive - hmm but worth it

Musings

Don't ya just love it when your bank decides that the new card they just sent you to replace the one you lost, is "lost" and thus gets eaten by the first cash point you put it into. Well it happened to me, thankfully I was in enough time to get into the bank proper and inquire as to what had happened and see if I could get some cash, that's when I found out that they had accidently (on purpose cos the card I had, had a really short life span like 3 months) put through that my card had been lost again... darn it so thus the reason for it beening eaten by the cash point (well that and they keep forgetting to feed them - poor things) and guess what was wating when I got home..
the Nice new shiny card valid for a good while longer than the one that just got eaten.. Hmm wonder when I'll get the new pin (cos no doubt they will have reissued a new pin)

Parents :|

Parents wouldn't be here without them but sometimes they can be a ROYAL pain in the f**king arse(pardon my lingo).
They've been getting funny calls - withheld numbers since thursday and they have got it into their heads that it's my sister (who they ain't speaking to - don't ask ya don't wanna know) or her boyfriend making the calls
I know for a fact that it's not but they still think it is, well I told them straight that it's not and that I'll fix the phone so no-one can call without us knowing who is callin'....

Time to call BT I guess

What a week

Darn the late shift at work is a DRAG..
Thank god it's over *YAWNS*

Game Talk : Joint Operations

Hmm oh what a nice game Joint Operations : Typhoon Rising is or rather WAS..
updated it as requested..
read what the update did and went :| I normally play a sniper role in the game
Snipers have been to put it bluntly Castrated :-& Scope should have a Zoom, it's gone, fixed times Scope now, my fav weapon the L115A has had a reduction in the scope zoom for x16 to x12 :| a few other bugs as well - hmm but heck there is enough to fill a WHOLE forum - well a Novaworld forum anyway - I'm not the only one slighty / majorly / now where did I put my "gun" peeved off with Nova Logic for doing this change..

It also did crazy stuff - now I had to uninstall it an reinstall it, I updated to the previous patch since I had that and it works WAY better..Can't get on to 99% of games online with it because I REFUSE to update again..

A Bad Day / Good Day

Hmm got woken up to be told that someone who as far as I'm concerned should crawl under a rock and never be seen again, had turned up :| that really ****ed me off, great start to the day.
I had decided that maybe I should upgrade my graphics card but was only thinking about it until I got told, so I was to the Computer shop for some Retail Therapy - My Style.
Got a Nice New Graphics Card that runs like twice as fast as my old one, has 4x the video memory on it and what can I say runs sweeet as a nut..
oh boy tried it out on a game I normally have to have the fx down on, turned EVERYTHING to do with FX on in the game and I mean them all, played smooth and it was like Huh is this the same game... I could actually make stuff out clearer and from further away it was like OMG...
Got a few more games as well so gonna have fun playing them

Birthdays & Fireworks

Hmm had an okay day at work,came home, went to see my sister to hand her, her b/day card :D and got roped into setting of some fireworks (safely of course) for my nephew and his young friends :) that was fun for 25 minutes until someone complained they were too noisy this was at like 7:30pm and it wasn't like we were near her well about 20-25m away and had set off all the rockets we were gonna set off anyway :| bah humbug of well it was fun..

Back to Work

Hmm oh well holiday all over, back to work today. Nice quiet day today thank god, only the usually monday crap but did I expect any less NO... :D Gotta love it

Almost The End of My Holidays

Ah what a nice relaxing (well not needed to drive to work, actually work, then drive home) 2 weeks I've had :)
Oh well back to it on monday morning bright and Oh My God it's an EEEEarly start..
Got all of the things I want done, done. Well Not true but they are completed enough that I don't give a stuff about it...

My Xmas Present Real Early

Well I've got my xmas gift from my parents already.. well I needed something fit into the space that my computer once sat in, so I now have a DVD Player with built in 5.1 Surround Sound decode / amp :) and a TV to go with it...and the bass on it ROCKS

The Unit / My Room

Well my room has been swept (great having a wooden floor) and all the dust removed and stuff, telephone system redone slightly as I don't need a phone socket where I had it anymore lol... The unit got cleared out, the back taken off, put flat then disassmebled not like I did before (stupid head that I was), taken back down to my room, mum helped me here as it's kinda difficult to move a piece of wood that is 6ft long and about 2 1/2 ft wide down a ladder as it's kinda heavy.. so moved everything out of the way to rebuild it, rebuilt it in like hmm 20 minutes - god Im getting good at doing that. Oh well time to go get another unit for my PC to sit on, one that can handle my printer, scanner, 5.1, mouse /keyboard and erm a few other USB devices lol :) Wow thats a long entry I need a drink.. AH much better nothing better that ice cold coke right from the fridge (god bless mini-fridges)

The Attic cont...

Hmm I was right, got the unit up and it didn't look okay this wasn't before I had managed to actually almost wreck it taking it apart darn it, took it down the wrong way stupid me...it still goes together though so that's okay..
well that's all the PC's up, stuff up, just now got to set them up.. oh boy I forgot how many cables and stuff was behind this pc. hmm 5 Usb, 3 stereo leads for 5.1, mouse / keyboard wireless reciever, video cable...

The Attic...

The Attic is now floored, so all i need to do is get stuff up here lol :> ya ya thinking about it I don't think the unit my computer is in will look up there but we will see.

New Car

Got My New car, me happy again...
What Me not happy about is I've lost my bank card and almost didn't get my car because of it... oh well happy days are here again...
oh and it drives really sweeeeet...

Ah Last Day for a While

Ah Last Day at work okay so I worked the late shift this week but who cares...
2 Weeks OFF - bliss, got things to do but they will all get I hope...
Floor the attic, move PC's, move furnature, set up PC's again, re-network all the pc's adjust the lights up there. Oh and get a newer car as mine is stuffed :|

Car Update...

Me Thought about it, phoned the place that has the Ford Ka to see if it's still there, it is, told the Senior Sales Manager I want the car so oh well me guess me will be paying it off for the next few years...
But I'm Happy Again....

Car Update...

Hmmm went looking at few cars today - hmm tempted by a few
nice almost new Vauxhall Corsa, bit pricey, a not bad Puegot 206 and a nice Silver Ford Ka (I know it's not to everyone's taste but I like).. £3,995 much newer than my old car so me happy, have said I'll think about it..

My Car....

Hmm decided to go look at my Car's MOT certificate the other day... eep! it's due, so books it in for today and...... (dramatic pause)
it fails :| BADLY, so badly it's not worth fixing, would cost me as much to fix as the car is worth, infact the 6 CD changer I got in the car is worth more than the car itself...
I liked tha car :( Now I'm gonna have to go hunting and find out how much the car is gonna cost me and how much the insurance for it is gonna cost
and to top it all I ordered some flooring so I can move all my PC's into the attic this morning... oh well it's only money.

Working...

Oh well couldn't get out of it for ever worked today for a few hours - darn that was SO boring.................

My Birthday

Woo hoo My Birthday Wow...
30 yrs old, god life does drag sometimes

Ponderings

Hmm just worked out I've been with the same company for 3 1/2 year sheesh what a long time...
Darn it gonna be working 12hr/day all week - eep!
oh well time to get some sleep then ...

Lifeless

I have NO life what so ever, All I do is work, work, work..
All my friends are far enough away that it's difficult to organise a night out with them. Not that i go clubbing, etc, not my kinda thing at all..
Maybe that's why I lost the one thing i truly cared about...
Mind you I blow that one totally all on my own..
I don't think I will ever LOVE again, I don't know anything anymore.
I've even though of deleting my self.. I thought about all the ways I can but it take bravery to do that kind of thing and I'm not that brave, well I am but only in my own personal "space"
So thus I have no life, all i can do is move one foot in front of the other
Every day it's a case of plodding onward one step at a time.

Est Sularus oth Mithas

Randomesque Entry

Are the next 3 weeks are gonna be fun, fun, fun...?
Nope, Eek... Why! cos hmm let see from this tuesday to two weeks on wednesday I'll be working 12 shifts - 5 days a week, overtime galore thankfully
pattern: work, eat, sleep, work, eat,sleep....

Holidays

Oh The Joy, I've got all my holidays sorted out for the rest of the year...
Got 2 weeks booked off the end of October - what I'm gonna do with them is still in "planning"...

Confused ?!?

Is it possible to fall in love with someone?
I think, I don't know, maybe it's just my instinct to protect coming out
I don't know, I'm Confused!
And the rest at work don't help, always making remarks about the 2 of us, I don't think she's notice yet...
I was thinking of writing a letter, but I don't wanna ruin the friendship we have right now !!!

Evening Invite

Oh what a day, weddings are always such fun... the fun really begins after the meal has been eaten and all the extra guests (like yours truly) arrive...
Had loads of fun, the whole of the daystaff were there...
Good fun was had by all,even me and I wasn't drinkin'
I just Ache a little all over...

Back Online

Got Persuded by "online" on my pagers and in chat, cos I was missed :)
Well that was the point kinda.. besides it gave me breathing space...
On a Lighter and different note.. I'm going to a Evening Reception at the weekend - that will be a laugh (I don't think) everyone in the daystaff have been invited and I mean everyone and we're all going..

Not looking forward to it, but then again I'll be saved as my friend / colleague / part-time partner in crime is going as well, picking her up in fact.

Online Chat

Decided today that after lastnight and me vapourising my website (again)... I've had enough of the crap I get in there etc. If i wanted that heck i just need to step outside.
All my pagers is off-line until further notice... If they ever get switched on again that is...

Website

Hmm darkness and shadow are all that are left in my webspace.. it's gone, deleted, Unrecoverable

Thunderbirds

Hmm went to see this with my good friend :), great film, the highlight of my week.. That's right going to see a film is the highlight of my week.. Sad ain't it... oh well I don't got a life I only have work!

Holiday

Ah Nice Got a whole week off work to do stuff, maybe..
I might actually get around to doing some of it lol
Might go see a few movies that are at the cinema I don't know..

A Movie Giggle

Hmm went to see Shrek 2 with my friend - what a laugh, it don't matter if you ain't see the 1st one it still makes sense - laugh a minute in some parts
ah felt great for a while.. Hmm oh to live once in a while....

Movie Anyone?

Just decided something at work today, asked my friend if she wanted to go see shrek on Friday, she said she'd look into when it was on, I said cool, I'll buy the tickets you can pay for the popcorn. Only seemed fair we did opposite the last time - Harry Potter :D that was fun film to see..

Living Life 2hrs at a time (Coming to a Cinema Near You)

Website

Hmm decided website needed some work.. oh wait no i didn't decided it was total amatuar Crap and deleted it... Nice Blank white index page now... that is all that is left.
Ah the weekend oh great..

Work...

Went in to work today like a bear with a sore head...
Me Gonna have to make big appology tomorrow..
Gonna blame the heat as it was too warm no matter what I do and felt dehydrated :-S

Thank God It's Over - Continued

Hmm okay let me clear a few things up need to do so anyway,
Someone who I disowned aka he's related by blood but that is all as far as I'm concerned... Hope that clears something up.. Enough said.. Want more details if you know me, send me a message you know the contact points..

The Meeting...

Hmm Went to sisters to resolve problem of "non-entity" who was at house (see previous entries).
My sister is stubborn as hell!! She wonders why mum didn't phone her to tell her he was around, etc, etc, saying "she's just looking out for herself and her reputation." Great eh.
Accusation & Counter Accusations flying around, great still no further forward.
Also went to fix scanner - it's not broken computer can't see it.. still can't see it. Great day. Really great. Oh well guess I'll just have to "upgrade" her machine a little :|
Oh What a Marvelous Day.
Mother was Worried when I got home wondering what was said, I lied a little said I had went to a mate who had called me.. She wasn't happy but tough

Thank God It's Over (Part 1)

Well it's over(ish). Someone is gone but there are still people to sort out and I've said I Will sort it out somehow......
This is gonna be fun...

D-Day

I knew this day might come, just hoped it never would....

Got in to work, ah nice day.. well apart from somethings being a little off due to other people being stupid but nothing new there eh... Driving home thinking of the fun weekend I'm gonna have cos my mate will be down all weekend and I can sit and relax, chill out and kick ass on-line all weekend...
but no almost home and my mobile rings... My sister, problem at home.. Don't go home come to her house... So I go and well get told someone whom I wish was dead (I don't wish people dead very often believe me) is in the what I consider my house, and I can't do **** all about it...
Weekend almost ruined - saved though cos I don't need to really leave my room :D

More Computers - Later

Hmmm dived into computer shop after work since i thought power supply for it was going, no they said try the processor in another board which I did and the same result - argh had to shell out for new processor / Heatsink & Fan as I needed it that day as they I do get a replacement CPU but not until it's been sent back to suppliers now... so there is 64 quid down the drain - well not really - just money I don't need to spend later when I get another system together lolz

Computers

Don't you just hate when something decides not to work, hmm my other pc is set to start up a specific time each day... yesterday it started but didn't start (i.e. power on but no-one at home) and I ain't got time to see to it as I got work.....
I come home from work - left it on cos I couldn't be bothered - power up and it start wierd, mind you been doing this for past few days :-S

Today it wouldn't start - went to work - came back still nothing, tried power supply - nope, video card nope - thought stuff it... I'll get back to it later...

The Party

Well it was erm how can we say, interesting... knew exactly 7 people at this party, there was like 60 or so there... I just sat down in a nice quiet spot at the back away from the main load of tables, sipped on my Irn Bru and kept quiet as much as possible, damn DJ played a few song or Dance Mixes of a few songs that hurt a little, but the almost killer blow came later, my ex sang her favourtite karoke song -> Roxette - It Must Have Been Love....
Some how I kept it together - if i had been drinking alcohol I would have been out of it... totally out of it...
I just wanted to leave but im a coward and didn't, im not as strong as I thought I was... I should have left but that would have left ???'s too many ???'s
Oh well at least i didn't have to step back into the shadows again...

Working...

God damn I was ask to work today, No way I said...
little or no notice so NO will be the answer to that one..

Me, My Mate & Harry......

Woo hoo been invited to go and see the new Harry Potter movie by my mate since her friend don't want to see it and I want to see it and we both don't want to look stupid by going seperatly to see it :> I like friends like that..

Party

Hmm I guess I'll be going on my own to the 21st I've been invited to, as mate can't make, they got something else more important on that weekend...
Hey Im cool with it, means more fun can be had maybe :>
but no "exit" route without look suspect.. oh well ;)

From The Shadows......

Hmm thought it was time to add a new entry... so here goes..
Ah Summer is here, more sunshine in my life :) and Im not just talking during the day ;)
I think I'm finally stepping from the shadows into the light, letting it touch me, soothe me, recharge me... no longer do I hide from the light..
ah it feels good :) maybe I should just hibernate :P or drink more fluids ;)
darn not being hydrated enough will send ya a little screwy :D only just finding that out... it explains a lot

Peace Out ... :)
*sending out a gentle bearhug to all who read this, the kind that warms from the inside out*

What a Day

Hmm Had to work today, I know everyone else off today and I had to work thank god for radio, Radio 1 to be precise they did a 10hr pick your own songs type show and it was a cracking good show apart from one glitch...
Why oh WHY would anyone in their right mind want "Spice Girls - Wannabe" played - full listing is available at the website just look for "10 hour takeover" or similar
I got to clean the house over the next few days ARGH I hate cleaning..

Films

Argh!! Darn it Can't watch any of them... DVD drive appears to be broken either that or the software has gone and died... Argh wasn't able to watch anything... and I won't until I can figure it out and get it fixed

Easter Weekend

Oh the joys of easter, hmm well maybe...
Lets see this year I've not got any easter eggs and not bought any not even from my nephew, mind you he'll get enough from other people..
I also got work the long weekend :| oh well at least it should be quiet at work - well maybe....
Hmm learned a new command today: End What If :)
I've stuck a whole load of them in the program that is my life...
Ah! much better...
Hmm the only things I now got worry about is watch Film to watch next

No More Alcohol.....

Though it was about time I stuck another entry into this online diary of my life (what there is of it).
Well I decided a few weeks ago that I wouldn't get anymore alchol like i normally do when Im not working the next day, so far so go, been almost a month.
Alcohol wasn't "doing anything" for me, wasn't helping me forget, was more like showing me the "darkness" Not a Good Idea at all.
I watched Donnie Darko the other week on DVD and I got it 1st time, got me thinking it did..... Life is what it is and nothing can change that even if you could change time other things you might not want to happen will happen... A Paradoxical Thought eh..

"The Darkness....."
Hmm why I still go back to all the point of my first true relationship, looking for things I could have done differently, things I should have done, things I shouldn't have (possibly), should have said, should never have said (words can hurt greater than any blade can). Think IF ONLY, but now it's too late for that.
Those who say "you'll get over it" or "go out and find someone new" have never felt the true pain of breaking up with someone you deeply love.
Im one of those people, I wear my heart on my sleeve, what can I say...
I show my emotions the full range, I cry, weep, sob, smile, laugh, giggle, glow with inner happiness, blush, grimice and all the other emotions you can feel... although the negitive ones don't get to rear there head that often, I try not to bear grudges etc..
There I've Said it.. Heartache takes Time but at least I can say "I feel"

Ponderance

Hmm well lets see it's Sunday, I didn't get up until Afternoon, Dang this cold... Mind you I suppose I am fighting it...
Hmm my mate was around the other day, dropped of a game called Tetris 4000, hmm intrestingly ADDICTIVE game, 2 games, many levels and difficulty settings also, you can put your own music in the background .......

Modems

How is this for stupid, my modem dies and I'll be able to get broadband at the end of the month.. Hmm oh well get a new modem in a few days when Im not working

Life Errors

Hmm I don't know if Im up, down, to the left or to the right....
I'm all over the place, some days I just feel like crying for no reason... wierd.... ARGH!

Ponderings and musings

Hmm well that time of year approaches, just another day to me.
I get to watch all the romantics in the world do all the romantic stuff like flowers, cards and stuff.. hmm fun...
What will I be doing... working, but it won't be without some fun....
Boy setting up the office staff they way I have is so much fun...
now I really must figure out how to / who to get to do some flash for me :>
I know you'll all tell me it's simple but heck I can't get my head around it yet..

Having Fun and on the rebound still (so keep away :P)

Hmm What a Day

Hmm it's been one of those days at work, you know the sort where you wanna just come home half way through but stay on just to say you did it...
hmm well colleague went to set up a CCTV camera on a remote site and all went well till he turned it on... and the gremlin of a Duff Connection reared its head.. BT said the line was okay (it wasn't) well got the camera up eventually and got it all running and as then it died totally, I left with it down... oh well thank god I got a nice 4 days off to relax in....

Happy and Tired

What a Week

Hmm well what a week...
Windscreen got scratched and needed replacing.. the bit that caused the scratch I can't get till tuesday at the earliest (dang cars)
Hmm work is work.. loving winding my boss up with the "affair" me and the company sectary are supposed to be having... lol what a laugh
Hmm decided that having the slowest machine as the main machine wasn't on.. besides I want 5.1 Sound :D shame it takes so dang long to re-install Everything.. Power cuts excluded...

Well I'm off to sleep / have some fun or both ;)

Hmm Interesting

I ask the Question, What made you think we were drifting apart / why didn't you say anything yesterday and so far nothing... odd oh well....
What is one to do eh?

Woke Up and Found The Sun / It's Good to Talk

Hmm woke up this Morning and saw the sun... Yeah The Sun you know that Yellow Star about 93 million miles away that provides heat and stuff, that... (Previous entry was erm "late / early") and after that entry someone got on to me... hmm Thank you Sav... Made me see sense when I wasn't sobar (hmm interesting)..
But I woke up this morning and felt better, hmm It's part of the healing process.
I care about the answer to the question but it's not important now...
Oh I took someone elses advice as well give my PC a "minor" upgrade, well my K6-3-400 got retired I replaced it with a XP2600+ :D just to crunch :P